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How Emily Patterson, Owner of Johnson and Toxin, Ended Up Homeless
I don't bother trying to hide it, I've been homeless since June17, 2011.

Keywords: johnson and toxin, homeless, emily, patterson
Date Created/Edited: April 12, 2015 / Update: 2015, October 25
I've told many people that I would put this information together as soon as possible. Yes, it is possible to become homeless due to situations beyond your control...
Images of homelessness...

Sores on my face continue to get worse. Unable to bathe properly or regularly, stress, chronic filth and bugs chewing on the sores when I sleep keep them from healing. I decided against posting pics of the abscesses.

I bathe as best I can in public bathrooms.

Most often, I sleep in the dirt on a towel on moldy canvas as out of sight as possible.

Occasionally, I can sleep in a bathroom with a locked door, which allows me to rest a bit better than outside in the dirt, literally with rats walking over me while I try to sleep - something you never get used to.

The tent I used to have. Stolen like so much of the stuff I was trying to save.

My son, Calvin. I miss him. Only 21 years old and gone. And I couldn't even say good-bye to my baby. So sad.
UPDATE: 2016, July 23
Realizing only 1% of visitors to the site care enough to support the effort. It's really sad when people would rather let me starve on the streets than continue working on the site. So far beyond poor now that I no longer qualify for food stamps since I cannot walk 30 miles to job training. Obviously, I'm capable of working - just not able to sleep, bathe, have clean clothes, etc., in NO position to be able to get a normal job. Would have to give this up to do that anyway. Without food stamps, when there is not enough in gifts from the site to buy food, I have to walk to the only food pantry (free food for dirt poor) is a 6 hour walk. I don't receive enough from all this work to even keep a bicycle on the road. Working on accepting that after 5 yrs of this, I'm likely going to die on the streets. I doubt I'll ever have a vehicle again and be able to at least see my oldest son's grave - dead almost a year at 21. My youngest son wouldn't even know what I look like. Over five years since I've seen him. I'm in hell with no way out. But I kept working, huh? Not even going to be an option as support is pathetic and I have to spend my time walking for food instead of working for money. If I could raise $1,500, I could get a roof over my head. But all this work doesn't even pay enough for food.
UPDATE: 2016, May 21
My birthday is on the 23rd. Only two more days. Another year on the streets (since June 17, 2011). This is like a never-ending nightmare. Something has to change soon - I just can't take much more of this.
UPDATE: 2016, May 10
My youngest son's birthday is today. I can't talk to him, tell him Happy Birthday. Blocked by his father for over 5 years - haven't seen my son since March of 2011 or even been allowed t to talk to him since April of 2011. My ex is a nightmare. Only been sent two pictures of my baby in over 5 years. I begged, 300 emails, before he finally sent one. I sent Children and Youth in PA a copy of the request for the second one. Can't call the police to check on my son anymore. They get mad at me for being dirt poor and homeless - but the reason I'm homeless is because my ex decided to keep all the money he owes me and let me live in the streets. He even refuses to send the bank info so I can cash in a CD that's mine and have money to at least get into a place to live, so he does all he can to ensure I suffer as much as possible. He's winning, that's for damn sure, eh?
UPDATE: 2016, May 8
Not online much today. It's my first Mother's Day since my oldest son died at only 21 years old. Hard day. Haven't seen my youngest son in over 5 years now. Can't even tell him I love him because I'm blocked by his father, have no money for a place to live let alone lawyers to fight my ex's continued abuse of me and our remaining son.
UPDATE: 2016, April 12
Someone finally sent a gift enough to cover the monthly storage fee. So, back to work. Will do the consumer letter to Johnson & Johnson shareholders and, if enough money comes in to pay server fees on the 25th, will still be able to be online to take part in the shareholder meeting on the 28th.
UPDATE: 2016, April 9
I wasn't able to raise enough to keep my storage this month. It's finally gone, the last of my stuff locked in a 4 x 4 unit to be tossed eventually. I have a change of clothes, towel and bathing stuff. Not like I have much left. No momentos, nothing that isn't absolutely necessary. I have a ziplock bag big enough for the computer and will do what I can to keep it from getting stolen or wet. I doubt it will make it the rest of the month before it's gone or dead. I will send out files that I PDF'd and stored in my phone until the 22nd when I lose my phone service. On the 25th when I can't pay the bill the site will be totally gone. I'm down to nothing left, ya'll. Later. emily.
UPDATE: 2016, February 26
I prayed and prayed for a miracle to get a cheap car or at least a cheap trailer in the crap part of town. Well, did raise enough for my storage unit, cell phone, domain registration and maybe enough to renew my T-Mobile on the second of March. But nowhere near enough for a car or place to live. People think there is soooo much money in fighting a massively powerful corporation, but there's barely enough to keep basic services needed to keep the site going and a couple meals let alone anything else.
March will be FIVE YEARS since I've seen my youngest son, who is only 13 and my ex destroyed me financially and left me on the streets since my little guy was only 8 years old. I wish there was at least enough to survive in a normal way, but there isn't and I no longer hope there will be after 4 yrs of running this site and still stuck without enough money to pay for even cheap transportation, so not even much hope of ever having a normal job. So, I'll keep doing this because there's not much else in the way of opportunity for me. I hope that with more work (I put in 12 to 16 hours a day) more people will find some compassion and help a little more so I can get out of this poverty filled rut and see my remaining son again.
UPDATE: 2015, December 28
I prayed and prayed for a miracle to get me at least one night off streets for Thanksgiving. Did not raise enough money for night off streets, but did raise enough to cover bills - phone, t-mobile, my 4x4 storage unit with the last of what I own, server fees, a pair of jeans so I have more than one pair of long pants, a pair of sneakers so I have shoes other than sandals and a pack of socks - but still no way to have a real shower or sleep in a bed for the holiday.
I prayed and prayed I raise enough over the holidays to get a night or two off the streets, but no luck. Was able to keep phone on, storage paid snd server / hosting fees are paid up until the end of March 2016. But not enough for a night off the streets or the luxury of a shower and a night in a bed for Christmas.
I was finally able to get a PA State Trooper to check on my youngest son - after begging for three MONTHS. Ex refuses to give me any information about my son at all. Trooper told me that my 13 yo son is autistic? Uh, he wasn't autistic at 8 years old and autism is noticed in the first three years of life. He's suffering from trauma at the loss of his mother. A lot of people reaslized just what an asshole my ex is when he didn't even tell me my oldest son was DEAD until AFTER he was buried.
In March it will be five YEARS that my ex has been blocking any communication between me and my youngest son. I wish I had the money I need to be able to fight to see my son who I never stop thinking of every minute of the day. The emotional trauma of losing his mother drove my oldest son to drugs - he died from a bacterial infection on August 17, 2015. My psycho ex didn't tell me until AFTER my baby was BURIED. How cold, cruel and callous. But, it's my ex, what else would I expect?
So here I sit, still on the streets and that situation is even worse. I am no longer allowed in the public park because I'm homeless. So tired of being treated as though I am less than human, lower than an unwanted dog. So, now I no longer have access to unlimited electric at the park - have to do a four mile bike ride just to get to new source of electric that is only allowed for a few hours per day - if there is no rain since I have only a bicycle and have to keep the computer dry during the ride to and from the park. It makes it even more difficult to keep working - doing what I can while looking for a job - but I'm still trying to do this for the benefit of all.
UPDATE: 2015, October 25
For those who haven't read the original article of how I ended up homeless, the original article is below this update.
In the original article, I was living in a tent in the woods. Well, others who lived in the same woods were partying and carrying on, making too much noise and dropping their garbage all over the place. The police gave us all warning and kicked everyone out of woods. I packed up my tent in a cooler to go get it when I found a new spot to set it up, but someone stole it and my two old bicycles in less than 48 hours.
Last summer, an opportunity for an old, gutted houseboat came up. There were quite a few gifts sent that got me a dinghy (small rowboat) to get back and forth to the houseboat anchored in a lagoon. Gifts also paid to paint it, some caulk, tools, etc. Well, after two anchors somehow disconnected, pictures being taken of me, the dinghy and the houseboat, I decided it wasn't worth risking my life for it - and couldn't find a way to replace the borrowed anchor anyway. So, back out to the streets I went. I was planning to sell the dinghy, which was an 8 ft JonBoat - but it was stolen less than a week after I got off the boat. That's how it goes when you're homeless and have no place to lock things up on your own property.
I was unable to get a job because I had no ID. I had no address to use to get photo ID - no one lets a homeless person use their address for ID. My 21 yo son died on August 17. I was not told until after my ex had buried him. Wasn't even able to send flowers, let alone attend, the burial of my baby. Unable to get to PA, I can't even visit his grave. It still kills me. Well, I contacted Domestic Relations in PA, explained my ex's callous choices intending ONLY to hurt me as much as possible. They finally dropped the child support for my 13 yo son (who has illegally been kept from any contact with me for almost 5 years by his father, the same asshole who didn't tell me Calvin was dead until after he was buried and took me 300 emails just to get a pic of Justin a year ago, none since. I have NO CLUE what my son looks like. I hate my ex for what he's done to us. Kept all the money, left me in the streets and kept my sons from me.) and even gave me contact information for getting my ID back.
However, now that I have ID, a job is still out of reach. I did get food stamps and signed up with a food pantry. But after being homeless for over 4 yrs, I'm exhausted from no safe place to sleep - doze off basically a few minutes every hour with only a two or three hour nap in the dirt, on a floor, on a bench or picnic table, once a day, some days not even that much. My old clothes are pretty much rags. Stained, fraying and pants/shorts have holes in them. I don't have money to even wash what little I have, so my clothes reek of urine, feces, sweat and mold. I have sores on my face and abscesses on my breast, knee and foot. My legs and feet are swollen from lack of sleep and it hurts to walk. So, it's not really possible to get a job while living in this hell. I stink, I look like shit, I smell worse than an outhouse and I chronically nod off due to chronic exhaustion.
I tried to raise money to get into an office I was told about. But I was ony able to raise enough to pay phone, storage, internet and server fees. If I had been able to raise the money for an office, I would have been able to keep doing this, but also make products for my Sunflower Naturals site and jewelry for my Sterling Dragonfly site. The income from those two would have been enough to cover the bills, save some money and get out of this nightmare. But, I couldn't raise the money to get off the streets even to be able to work more toward getting out of this nightmare.
I know one thing for sure, winter is coming, I have no shelter, not even a tent this year. I have sores on my face that won't heal which shows my immune system is wearing down. I have abscesses that are only slowly healing, reinforcing that my immune system is wearing out. I had a runny nose but am starting to cough, hoping I don't develop pnuemonia with such a weakened immune system. With winter coming, temps are starting to drop. I have no tent or sleeping bag, not even blankets. I have no clue how I'm going to survive the winter.
However, I'll keep working on this until I can't do anymore.
It would be great if you would choose to be one of the very few who choose to send a gift of help to support the site and help a homeless person get out of the nightmare. If you are one of the few with compassion, empathy or desire to support a cause that benefits everyone on the planet, Thank you.
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = 2015, April 12
Due to my ex-husband's chronic breach of contract regarding our division of assets and liabilities we agreed on in June of 2006, I have been left homeless, destitute, living illegally in a tent in the woods because I have nowhere else to go LITERALLY eating from garbage cans trying to stay alive. Without a place to live or proper photo identification, I cannot secure employment. I grew up in foster care, living with 'family' is not an option.
When my ex-husband and I met in March of 1992, I had over $25,000 in combined savings and a settlement of $26,000 arriving for injuries sustained from a motor vehicle accident in May of 1990. My ex-husband was living with his parents. I was working three jobs and planning on purchasing my first home with the money I had saved.
My ex-husband had a desire to start a handyman company. I paid to start the business. Fees, licenses, tools, truck payments, etc. and provided food, housing, utilities, child support payments while he started the business and was barely making enough money to keep up with supplies for new contracts.
In 1993, I paid the downpayment and all settlement costs on our first house. The equity from the first house was used as a downpayment for the house where my ex-husband currently resides.
We were married November 14, 1992. Our marriage deteriorated over the course of 13 years. When I finally left my ex-husband in October of 2005, I was being treated as though I were not even in the house, completely and totally ignored unless it was absolutely necessary for him to talk to me. I did spend a year attempting to repair the marriage by going back, counseling, etc. However, he continued treating me as an unwanted object instead of a wife so I chose to make the separation permanent due to chronic neglect.
In June of 2006, we created mutually agreed separation of assets and liabilities prior to divorce. We did not file it with the court as we both were satisfied it was a fair agreement based on our combined assets and liabilities.
These were the terms of our original separation agreement - after 15 years of marriage and we both worked:
- I agreed not to pursue future proceeds from the business I financed to start.
- I agreed not to pursue spousal support or alimony.
- He agreed not to pursue child support for our two children who were both minors and living with him at the time.
- I agreed not to pursue child support if the children reside with her at any time in the future.
- He was to refinance the jointly owned property and provide me with the agreed amount of $42,000 for my portion of combined assets relating to all jointly held physical property including returning the original financing for the first house, which was rolled into the second house. The property, furniture, furnishings, appliances, tools, garden equipment, etc. will become the sole property of him. HE gave me only $41,000 of the agreed on amount which she used to purchase a home at RR2 Box 477 C, Harveys Lake, PA.
In addition, my ex-husband accepted full financial responsibility for the following accounts:
- The remainder of a loan for a 2003/4 Dodge Caravan SXT and a jointly held account. The vehicle was supposed to be paid off and registered with me as sole owner of the vehicle. However, my ex-husband refinanced the vehicle and allowed the loan to default. I invested $2,500 (of my mortgage money) trying to save the van after I learned it was in repossession status - because I had to have the van to get back and forth to work for the two jobs I was working at the time. However, when it was time for registration, inspection and insurance, since the van was in my ex-husband's name as the sole owner and the loan was in default and I could not get it registered, inspected and insured before losing her jobs due to lack of transportation since the van was uninspected, uninsured and could not legally be driven on public roads. The loss of employment due to lack of transportation led to the loss of my house, all of my belongings because I could not afford storage and my ex-husband refused to come pick up even the children’s things out of the house before final foreclosure eviction on my property in Harveys Lake, PA on June 17, 2011.
- US Department of Education Account #: my ex-husband defaulted on payments on this account causing major damage to my credit score.
- HSBC NV Emily Patterson Account #: ----- I found out that my ex-husband forged my signature to open this account. My ex-husband borrowed the maximum amount possible – over $4,000 – and defaulted on the payments, causing major damage to my credit score.
- HSBC NV Joint account #: ----- I found out that my ex-husband forged my signature to open this account. My ex-husband borrowed the maximum amount possible – over $4,000 – and defaulted on the payments, causing major damage to my credit score.
On June 17, 2011, I faced the day of final eviction from my house. I had no where to go in PA and had a job offer for website development in Florida. I had no choice but to take the opportunity and hope it led to more work so I could return to PA as quickly as possible and see my sons. However, while that web site worked out well, work has been impossible to get since then since people aren't comfortable allowing people they just met to use their address for ID and job.
In May of 2013, my PA driver license expired. I had no address to use in FL so have not been able to renew the license, which was my only photo ID and REQUIRED for employment at a regular job.
In August of 2013, my ex-husband actually filed a Petition for Child Support, in violation of our agreement, against, get this: A HOMELESS PERSON. I have a tent in the woods, illegally, behind railroad tracks for at least a little shelter.
I am in the National Parent Locater Database, in an attempt to get me to 'disclose' my address, or to find me, which can't happen, since I haven't had an address since 2011 when my house foreclosed. It was explained to me that I could be facing time in jail until the initial child support hearing if I renew my photo ID an provide an address that will be kicked back to the National Parent Locater Database.
After all my ex-husband did to destroy my life, $15,000 debt against my credit, defaulting on evey aspect of our agreement, not even getting the children's things from the home that was foreclosed on, after years of neglect and abuse, I asked the child support intake person what I could do to get this to go away. She said that my ex-husband can come in and stop the Petition for Child Support at any time, it would just take a little paperwork.
I begged my ex-husband to drop the child support order. Of course, he refused so I'm still in the National Parent Locater database. I understand that his response is for me to ABANDON my child so his mentally ill partner can adopt my son and they can get more money from her disability. She's mentally disabled, I cannot say what for - but it cuts you to the core that she's so messed up and he wants me to abandon my child to him (after all of the above) and a mentally disabled woman.
So why do I do this instead of getting a real job? Because I can't exactly get a real job until I have ID, which I'd need an address, so a real job is out of the question unless my ex-husband decides to drop the child support and I can get my life back - and I seriously doubt that's going to happen. So, I keep begging money as needed to survival. At the moment, that's pretty much all I can do. I hope for an offer of web work or promotion for someone on the site, but I'm in a situation where I can choose to sit and drink booze and say screw it and beg money in a parking lot or hold a sign by the street for a few hours a week and make more money than I do with the site, OR at least be doing something useful for all. So, since the end result is in the best interest of a safe healthy future for my children, this ended up being the right choice since I have no other options at this time - because I'm NOT abandoning my youngest son.
Until I can find a way to save a bunch of money at one time, get a place to rent - even just a room, I'm stuck on the streets while trying to maintain this site. While I never intended for it to be an income stream, I am pretty desperate for gifts so I can quite literally, at least survive until something better and more stable comes along.
There you have it, How I Ended Up Homeless. It's been almost four years now stuck in this hell - you cannot imagine how horrible it is to live on the streets, at least I'm in a relatively quiet, homeless-friendly town. It's really worse than you can imagine. It's a lot worse than I imagined. I learned something though, I no longer look at homeless people totally different. While about 70% really are as bad as the image, 30% of us are in our situation due to circumstances beyond our control. The depression and frustration are unbearable at times. I'm one of the lucky few that has something to do to help take my mind off it. But when my belly is empty for days and I have no money to do laundry so I don't stink and I smell so bad due to lack of proper bathing facilities and clean clothes that I avoid people, even working on the site and researching corrupt dipshits isn't enough to keep my mind off the desperation. I haven't seen my youngest son in four years - as most of you are parents, I'm sure you can understand how hard just that one aspect must be to bear.
If you would like to give a gift to help keep me going so I can keep working on the Johnson and Toxin site and continue sharing the harmful products, suffering, social costs, corruption and JNJ shareholder education regarding our disgust with Johnson & Johnson and demand for change, feel free by entering an amount and click 'Send Gift'. Yes, I chose PayPal to process the transaction, so do other services - I just don't pay for the seamless transaction. All gifts are greatly appreciated.
If, by the Grace of God, I receive more than I need to keep myself fed, clean with a cell phone, and hope I can find a $50 room to rent, I will spread the rest around to organizations helping victims of a pharmaceutical product - and give some back to those who help supply the homeless in the area with food, clothing and grooming products.
Thank you very much for those who can afford a gift to keep me going,
Emily Patterson

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